Saturday, December 7, 2019

Wednesday, July 3, 2019

Spanking for Animals

Let me start with a critical clarification. My title is “Spanking for Animals”, not “Spanking of Animals.’” People who would hit an animal are garbage in my book. So read on to see what it’s all about.

Aunt Kay was, above all else, an avid animal lover. She was deeply intuitive with them and often did what I call “informal channeling” of people’s pets. I say “informal” because she would never, ever, point out her abilities. Instead she would simply observe and commune with someone’s pet – really as a casual thing when we visited – and then mention to them something important to the animal’s well being. Often the small adjustments meant a lot to the animal. I lead with that description so the rest of this would make more sense to you.

If I ever rated my 10 worst disciplinary sessions; which is not something I have done, I’m pretty sure screwing up something with animals would be the cause of two or three of the top five. I think it’s fair to say that those events were where I experienced her full anger.

Here’s one example of a situation.  We were living in a wooded canyon. Our house had a nice un-fenced yard. Anyway I had left a door open and our little doggie had apparently spent quite a while, I never figured out how long, happily wandering around outside. That canyon really had a lot of predators including raptor birds.

When she discovered what happened I got the pup safely back in the house and shut the doors. Well at least the dog was safe. She was furious and ordered me to get ready and wait. I didn’t ask anything. I went into that room and waited. Between her extra-enthusiastic use of implements and the lecture about what could have happened to our doggie and how long it went on (like forever), I’ll never forget a minute of it. You’ve heard the threat of a “spanking you’ll never forget”?  They are real.

You must understand that I love animals a great deal too. But I am not nearly as astute or conscientious as she was. But believe me, I got much, much better at it

However recently I was negligent when something happened to our doggie. I won’t go into the details, it’s too embarrassing. But suffice to say, after being informed that she had eaten something potentially toxic I was slower to go home and take care of her than I should have been. She is fine and recovered completely. But faster response would have been better.

I could almost feel Aunt Kay’s outrage and I needed to be punished appropriately. I can’t really describe the desperation I felt for it. But I had no outlet. It was a couple of months ago and I still feel incomplete.

Maybe this anecdote will inspire some of you to make animal welfare a top focus in your own behavioral programs. She would smile to know it if you do.

Wednesday, June 26, 2019

TO BE, or NOT TO BE - Spanked

The likelihood of ever again being in a relationship anything like what I had with Aunt Kay is pretty low. As best as I can tell the DWC/DD part of my life is over. The need probably will never go away completely. The issue is how I manage my emotional state with regard to that.

I hope that others who may be frustrated by the same lack can benefit from my sharing my internal processes about how I deal with the situation. And I am not in any way, even slightly, trying to say this is how to think or what to do. If there is any message it’s probably along the lines to just do some thinking and soul searching about whether or not one is actively managing this aspect of their life.

For one thing, I think about any judgments I might have when I see people with out-of-control behaviors in their lives. Whether it is substance addiction, habit addiction, or anything they don’t seem to be in control of.  I might say to myself “why don’t they just use more will power and eat less, or drink less, or not do whatever it is?” I might involuntarily think less of them in some way.

Then I look in the mental mirror and see my own compulsion for discipline and guess what. It looks just like the things I may judge others for; an urge that must be managed

I’m not making myself wrong for desiring it. I’m just trying to be a realist and asking “how much time, and psychic energy can I spend on a basically dead-end pursuit?” It’s a practical matter.

So for now anyway I will be trying to replace both computer time and mental activity associated with disciplinary material with other things. To fritter away time that I can use more productively seems very wrong.

I haven’t developed any master techniques as of yet to share. What I do is suck it up as best I can and quickly engage in an alternative activity. Even if I don’t feel as motivated as I would be for indulging in spanking material, I force myself to invest in it. So far I find that once I push into something else, I’m fine.

Just when I finally get it all mastered some woman will probably come along, recognize my subverted quirks and start the whole thing all over again. (That was supposed to be funny).

 Image result for hamlet to be or not to be

Sunday, June 9, 2019

A Fantastic DWC Event

Image result for waiting for a door to open

For me, the most dramatic group experiences I can recall with the DWC were when Aunt Kay did one of her Confessional events.  I’m pretty sure it’s written up somewhere on the website. But I want to share it here with my readers. Aunt Kay designed the event and a sweet couple from back East took care of the logistics.

There were about 8 couples; half I think from the East Coast and the others traveled in from elsewhere. We were together for two days. So the Confessional was only one of the activities.

For it the men were assigned to write a confession about something that they genuinely felt deserved punishment but had never been addressed. Most of the men took it quite seriously. I think one thought it more of a party game kind of thing and didn’t. Aunt Kay studied each of the papers carefully.

These were all new people for us. So she needed to get to know the women pretty quickly. Fortunately, as I have said before, she was very smart and was able to do that.

Once the event actually began, she sent all the men out of the house and had a long meeting with the women. I know for us guys it was nerve-wracking as to what was going on. When we were finally invited back to the house Aunt Kay told each man which woman he was assigned to and gave him his confession to read privately to her. It was a big place and everyone got private space.

After 30 or 40 minutes people began to gather back in the living room and when everyone was there we went around the room and people shared what they chose to about their experience. For one guy it was a life-changing experience. He released something deep and felt like a new person. For most of us it was an important experience and definitely made a difference in how we felt about our personal issue. I know I did. One guy didn’t really take it seriously and didn’t get more than a spanking out of it.

The group was together for a second day and night and people informally talked more about their individual sessions and what the lectures and spankings were like. The camaraderie and openness was amazing.

It turned out that one guy’s confession was about an issue the woman he was assigned to had a lot of passion about. I’m pretty sure that if there was a “who gave the most severe discipline” contest that woman would have won. I recall the guy’s expression when he described the lecture he got along with the spanking.

By the way, she never intended to imply, or even mix up the term, “confessional” with any religion. It was just the perfect word to describe the event.

Monday, May 20, 2019

Lonley Hearts Ads

It’s been a bit over a year and it has settled in, emotionally, that she’s really and truly gone. A big part of me was too freaked out to find my way back to normal reality. But I hacked my way through the thorns.

Recently speaking with a DWC couple, and especially to a firm-handed DWC wife, has been yet another kind of therapy for me. It reminded me what it feels like to be with people who understand such a private and important part of who I am.   For the first time I wondered if it was even remotely possible that I would find a DWC companion/friend. I was amazed that the thought surfaced and I recalled that Aunt Kay wanted me to continue to be disciplined. She said it was the best thing for me.

I thought about how often Aunt Kay would hear from single guys so desperate to find someone.  It always frustrated us and made us sad that it was so hard for DWC guys to find the relationship they need.  The Internet is a wild and woolly place and I have seen hundreds of ads from needy guys.  And frankly I find the majority of them crude. But I don’t know if they find their counter-part or what.

Aunt Kay always wanted to help guys find a partner. I know she counseled and coached and encouraged quite a few with some success. She especially felt it was such a waste that those guys were single because the vast majority of the time they would be a great partner.

Now it’s me joining the mass of guys who need a firm hand and discipline. The ideas that came unbidden to me as ways to at least get a good spanking are too embarrassing to elaborate upon. But they did reveal moments of almost desperation

What might my ad look like? “Older man desires a fun, companionable relationship with a woman who understands that spanking their partner keeps them healthy, and wise. Living in the Sierra Foothills of California.”

How would you write one for me, or one for yourself, or one for your partner?

Saturday, February 23, 2019


There's something very prevalent on spanking sites that really irritates me. It is the co-opting of images of women that have nothing to do with spanking and publishing them with "cute" spanking phrases added to the images. I brought this up to a guy who runs a popular spanking site and his solution was for me not to look at them if I don't like it.

I wonder how it must feel to those women. How I would like it if I found images of women from my family turned into "pornography", which is how I believe non-spanking people would perceive it.

This is, I daresay, an "Inconvenient Truth". To acknowledge that it's plain wrong and immoral, and eliminate that stuff would decrease the content available to spanking sites. It would also involve more rigorous curating by site/blog owners.

But, there is a lot in the world that needs changing. And this subject to me is really about making a choice for decency.