Thursday, February 2, 2017

It Takes a Village

It Takes a Village

A well known African proverb says “It takes a village to raise a child.”
While men with Disciplinary Wives are not children, the concept of a close-knit society keeping positive pressure on its members does apply.  I have read about societies that function that way and certainly some extended families do so as well. I think the primary reason that it works is that people cannot become “invisible” by going to a different neighborhood. So accountability for decent behavior is a normal way of life. While again, DWC men are not children, they are better off when there are a few “Aunties” in the picture. I have seen this concept at work in real -life extended DWC communities.

The extended community can add to the couple’s core DWC relationship in a few ways. For example, if couples get together, even occasionally, the whole concept of “Lifestyle” is significantly strengthened. It’s kind of like anything you do to reinforce your beliefs; such as attending any cultural or religious events. You may already know all of it. But being with others and discussing what you already know and believe makes it stronger.

And just like any close-knit community, members willingly pitch in to help one another. In the DWC world that help sometimes involves disciplinary matters.  For example, a wife might want to add embarrassment, or witnessing,  by having another wife join in on her husband’s discipline. Another example is when a wife is unable to administer a spanking – say for health reasons, or because she is out of town, and“Auntie” steps in. There have been several occasions when a hapless gentleman showed up at our house for just that reason.

So if that is a possibility for your relationship, it might be worth the effort to try to build such a community. It’s done one step at a time. Even connecting with just one other couple is a game-changer.  I am not implying it is easy. It takes commitment.

We once had that kind of community and it was wonderful. But things change; people get older and/or move to different locations. But  some of those friendships grew and have lasted through the years.

Due to physical problems at this time, if our community was still geographically viable, it would be my wife who needed to reach out. But that’s water under the bridge. Believe me, I am NOT complaining. It’s just all so interesting. I hope your take-away from this short read is to at least consider the opportunity to enrich your life by inviting in like-minded others.

This feels like this is a good place to share an interesting historical note about the Disciplinary Wives Club:

When Aunt Kay held her Couples Gatherings, the high point was always the Confessional sessions. The men would bring a written description of something they craved punishment for and release from. They were completely confidential. She studied them and then assigned each man to a different wife who would discuss the confession and administer the spanking. Believe me. The women took their responsibilities seriously.  The therapeutic result for the men who took the whole exercise to heart was beyond belief. A couple of guys reported getting rid of guilt from decades past.