If you are a regular reader of this blog you have a good idea of the amazing relationship Aunt Kay and I had. In case you are new I’ll give a quick summary. But you should read previous posts to see what it was all about.
It was a quarter of a century romance; a honeymoon from day one until the end. I adored her and I’d have to say it was the same for her toward me. We genuinely understood one another, put each other first, did just about everything together, and had more fun than anyone had a right to.
Soon after we got together I figured out that she was a whole lot smarter than me. Looking back it should have been obvious immediately. But I had this rare condition called “Male Ego” and it was only after I occasionally shut that guy up for a few minutes that I had that ah ha experience. I was thankfully smart enough to, from that point on, to take advantage of her brains and common sense. But I wasn’t exactly perfect at it; which is of course why punishment was necessary from time to time.
I have said in other places that to this day I am grateful for the person she molded me into. Even though she’s gone, her guidance is like a Jiminy Cricket conscience on my shoulder. Here’s a small example of that character building.
Early on we moved into a nice neighborhood; a real “Leave it to Beaver” environment. For those who don’t know the reference, it was nice, well-kept houses next to one another. People were friendly and stopped by to chat on occasion. You know, with the sweet grandma from down the block who rings your bell with cookies. Our kids loved it.
At the time I was gung ho about my career; long work hours and my head filled with work stuff all the time. So I was sometimes inadvertently rude to the neighbors; pretty much ignoring them. Little things like acknowledging their wave when I pulled into the driveway and waving back or having a two-minute conversation.
She kept asking me to be friendlier. She didn’t expect me to glad hand the neighborhood like I was running for mayor. Just be more aware and polite. I always agreed but very little changed. There were a couple of spankings that got my attention for a while. But I always returned to my self-absorbed ways.
Then one day while the kids were away she at me down for a serious talk about it. I never liked those “serious talks”. Across the table she locked into my eyes and told me how frustrated she was with my continuing rudeness. She pointed out that I had been spanked twice for that and wondered why nothing had changed. I made a lame attempt at explaining; which she correctly identified as “just agreeing with no intention of changing anything.”
When she told me I would have to write sentences I didn’t even know what she was talking about. I quickly found out. I had to write “I will be respectful and friendly to the neighbors at all times” one hundred times – and neatness counted. We were already a DWC couple, so I went to my office and began work. When I took a break I was sent right back in and told I could have dinner, or snacks, after it was done.
I worked as carefully as I could and when I presented it to her, more than two hours later, she looked it over fairly quickly, asked me if there were a hundred sentences there, and took my word for it. My wrist and arm hurt. But I was glad it was over. But then she told me to go into the bedroom for a spanking. I protested that it was unfair and unreasonable. I was outraged. She, on the other hand, stayed cool as a cucumber and repeated firmly that I had best march in there without any further fuss.
The spanking was definitely one of her inspired ones. Plenty of rapid smacks with a variety of implements and special emphasis when she reminded me of having said she was “unfair and unreasonable.” She didn’t appreciate that at all.
I guess the writing and then the spanking, which seemed like it would never end, was too much because I cried and cried. Afterwards I got cleaned up and we had time for a nice dinner before the kids came home from their friend’s house. I felt oddly peaceful and we just really enjoyed hanging out together like usual.
I can say truthfully that it changed me. I became friendlier with people in the neighborhood and at work. To this day I instinctively pay attention to people and take an interest in their affairs. And I enjoy it. As I said, it’s a small example of the character-building she did for me. God Bless her!