Wednesday, June 26, 2019

TO BE, or NOT TO BE - Spanked

The likelihood of ever again being in a relationship anything like what I had with Aunt Kay is pretty low. As best as I can tell the DWC/DD part of my life is over. The need probably will never go away completely. The issue is how I manage my emotional state with regard to that.

I hope that others who may be frustrated by the same lack can benefit from my sharing my internal processes about how I deal with the situation. And I am not in any way, even slightly, trying to say this is how to think or what to do. If there is any message it’s probably along the lines to just do some thinking and soul searching about whether or not one is actively managing this aspect of their life.

For one thing, I think about any judgments I might have when I see people with out-of-control behaviors in their lives. Whether it is substance addiction, habit addiction, or anything they don’t seem to be in control of.  I might say to myself “why don’t they just use more will power and eat less, or drink less, or not do whatever it is?” I might involuntarily think less of them in some way.

Then I look in the mental mirror and see my own compulsion for discipline and guess what. It looks just like the things I may judge others for; an urge that must be managed

I’m not making myself wrong for desiring it. I’m just trying to be a realist and asking “how much time, and psychic energy can I spend on a basically dead-end pursuit?” It’s a practical matter.

So for now anyway I will be trying to replace both computer time and mental activity associated with disciplinary material with other things. To fritter away time that I can use more productively seems very wrong.

I haven’t developed any master techniques as of yet to share. What I do is suck it up as best I can and quickly engage in an alternative activity. Even if I don’t feel as motivated as I would be for indulging in spanking material, I force myself to invest in it. So far I find that once I push into something else, I’m fine.

Just when I finally get it all mastered some woman will probably come along, recognize my subverted quirks and start the whole thing all over again. (That was supposed to be funny).

 Image result for hamlet to be or not to be

Sunday, June 9, 2019

A Fantastic DWC Event

Image result for waiting for a door to open

For me, the most dramatic group experiences I can recall with the DWC were when Aunt Kay did one of her Confessional events.  I’m pretty sure it’s written up somewhere on the website. But I want to share it here with my readers. Aunt Kay designed the event and a sweet couple from back East took care of the logistics.

There were about 8 couples; half I think from the East Coast and the others traveled in from elsewhere. We were together for two days. So the Confessional was only one of the activities.

For it the men were assigned to write a confession about something that they genuinely felt deserved punishment but had never been addressed. Most of the men took it quite seriously. I think one thought it more of a party game kind of thing and didn’t. Aunt Kay studied each of the papers carefully.

These were all new people for us. So she needed to get to know the women pretty quickly. Fortunately, as I have said before, she was very smart and was able to do that.

Once the event actually began, she sent all the men out of the house and had a long meeting with the women. I know for us guys it was nerve-wracking as to what was going on. When we were finally invited back to the house Aunt Kay told each man which woman he was assigned to and gave him his confession to read privately to her. It was a big place and everyone got private space.

After 30 or 40 minutes people began to gather back in the living room and when everyone was there we went around the room and people shared what they chose to about their experience. For one guy it was a life-changing experience. He released something deep and felt like a new person. For most of us it was an important experience and definitely made a difference in how we felt about our personal issue. I know I did. One guy didn’t really take it seriously and didn’t get more than a spanking out of it.

The group was together for a second day and night and people informally talked more about their individual sessions and what the lectures and spankings were like. The camaraderie and openness was amazing.

It turned out that one guy’s confession was about an issue the woman he was assigned to had a lot of passion about. I’m pretty sure that if there was a “who gave the most severe discipline” contest that woman would have won. I recall the guy’s expression when he described the lecture he got along with the spanking.

By the way, she never intended to imply, or even mix up the term, “confessional” with any religion. It was just the perfect word to describe the event.